A Relationship Budget

Many singles find themselves overwhelmed as they begin to enter a serious relationship. What to cut out to find time? Where to draw the line of defining self and opening to relationship? Consider a relationship budget. Sort through your calendar of important commitments and responsibilities and ascertain how much time you can comfortably allocate for a lover or life partner. If you have more than one lover, pick an amount of time available for total relationship. You can then divide this weekly or monthly budget up as you see fit.

This is a great technique to avoid not only overwhelm but resentment. It is more common for women to make themselves overly available and then start punishing men when she does not have the time for herself she needs to feel rested, expressed and loved. A budget does not need to kill spontaneity. But if there is an agreement to spend 30 hours a week together, it provides a framework for choosing what time would be the most worthwhile for all concerned. If there are a lot of spontaneous calls for hours at a time, then you cut out an evening or a weekend visit, or make it up the following week. If this is a big issue, it is worth it to log all time together and keep track of time credits and when you are overdrawn.

Action: Ascertain your ideal average weeks relationship time budget and communicate this with your partner.

Contents

Cresting the Waves:

A guide to sailing through life on

Relation-Ships

Dane E. Rose