Manic Depressive
As someone who might be considered at times “manic depressive” I have had the privilege of exploring both light and shadow deeply. It is as much of a “problem” to have too much energy as it is to have not enough. The problems are just different. I am coming to seek out and welcome the shelter of my “depression” to integrate all of the amazing activity that happens in the light. For one, my body will pass out from too much ecstasy ungrounded with shadow. For another, I can’t drive when I have too much alternate vision because the beauty of it overshadows the dimly lit reality of cars all around me. I feel like a painter administering doses of shadow and light to find the balance that best serves me at the moment. As I explore opening new things I close or freeze others to manage the tendency towards overwhelm. Of course I could expand my capacity for both, but that also has a price of energy that I do not want to incur all at once. It’s very much like managing cash flow: the best ideas in the world go south if we go bankrupt from spending faster than we allow the energy to come in. Action: Embrace the gifts of your current problems. These “problems” protect you from other “problems” which in turn protect you from others. Ultimately there are no “problems” only prices for the choices we make. When you know the relationship between the choices you make and the price they exact you can more consciously choose the problems that best support you. You are then in a good position to decide when to turn one “problem” in for another. Every problem is at one time a gift and at another time an encumbrance. Consider what “problems” you would have to face if you solved all your current problems.
Cresting the Waves:
A guide to sailing through life on
Relation-Ships
Dane E. Rose
